On the 2 month anniversary of my newest little man I decide to write my first post for my new blog! On this glorious Saturday afternoon I sit here enjoying a cup of tea whilst both boys are asleep and I’m alone… Yet again.. I thought I’d empty my mind a little about how life is now I have two beautiful babies under two years of age (with a husband that works extremely long hours and all my family interstate).
Challenging (read: frustrating) yet rewarding (read: magical) is probably the best way to describe life right now. The transition from one to two was surprisingly smooth. I was extremely anxious leading up to having two little ones with so little help but I can honestly say it isn’t any harder than with one. It certainly is exhausting and more time-consuming but getting out and about and doing everyday things doesn’t seem to be any different. How??? I’m not entirely sure either – but I do know that my frame of mind, confidence and knowledge are all so different this time round. I’m sure most mums to two (or more) would agree that being more relaxed about it all due to knowing what to expect is such a huge help. I can’t explain exactly how ‘un-relaxed’ I was with my first, but I know I’m so much calmer and confident with everything this time. I would often stay at home all day with my first waiting for the right moment to go out (the baby had to be sufficiently fed, had had enough sleep and even have done an adequate poo!) before I felt like it was time to leave the house. This time not only do I have no choice with number one having such a huge social commitment but I also realised that a new baby can be quite adaptable! They can sleep whilst driving to and from a destination and have their nappy changed or be fed once there.
I must put a disclaimer in right here though that number two is so extremely happy and calm and easy-going. He sleeps well – day and night and feeds well and even spends his awake time so well! This perhaps is why things seem so easy.. But then again maybe this baby isn’t in fact any different to number one – maybe it’s my attitude to being a mum and my ability to understand the cues etc that have made it easier? It’s a tough one to call, but either way I’m grateful for how easy things have been for these two months despite feeling sorry for myself on the odd occasion (like today) when my dear husband is working hard and I’m not able to enjoy some family time on a weekend like (what seems to be) all the other little families out there are!
I can’t finish this post without commenting on the lack of family and even lack of husband (for so many hours a week) around… I think of how much easier things would be if I had someone here to help with little things Every. Single. Day. Like seeing my worst-bedside-manner-ever-obstetrician for my post-natal appointment… This is where the challenging (frustrating) certainly comes into play. The total meltdown number one had whilst number two was crying with hunger while we were in the waiting room (with other patients) was frustrating and not because I was running down the hall of the hospital with the baby attached to my breast trying to grab the toddler with one hand, but frustrating that I didn’t have someone to come with me to help out.. Of course I have many friends with several being extremely generous and helpful (the kind of helpful where staying the night to look after number one while I was in labour was not a problem in the world and coming to swimming lessons to look after number two while I’m in the pool with number one isn’t an issue) but I certainly wouldn’t want to push the boundaries of my friendship too much and I can’t ask these wonderful people to drop everything for me too often when they have their own families. But I wouldn’t think twice about asking a family member. Despite my daydreams about it being easier if I was closer to family, we manage… And at the end of every day when my beautiful babies are happy, healthy and so very loved I am rewarded by their presence and all the challenges are worth it ten times over!